A year ago during the summer, I was making plans to come on a LDS mission(which I am serving now). I was preparing myself by working at my dads sign business, saving up the necessary funds to come on a mission, and studying to become a effective teacher.
I received my call in Las Vegas, Nevada, approximately around ten o'clock at night. My mother calling me on the phone, telling me where I was called to serve.
She told me "Called to serve in the Santa Rosa, California Mission." First thing that went through my mind was, Santa Rosa California? Where in the World could it be? I had no clue where this place was, I had the idea it was southern, towards the border of Mexico. It was a bit surprising to learn it was on the opposite end of the state, Northern California. I looked on a map and peace instantly came over me. I was needed here. Thoughts kept running through my head, what was it like there? Who's going to be my first companion? What are the people like? I was so excited.
Just for your information I had never left my home for more than a week, especially from my parents.
The excitement of going on a mission was overwhelming. As a couple months went by, the day grew closer to enter into the training field. It came very soon. The day I reported to the missionary life of the MTC(Missionary Training Center), I quickly expressed my gratitude to my parents, gave them both hugs and I was off on the journey. Feelings of joy, anxiousness, and desire were swelling in my whole body. As I walked off, my parents were filled with joyous, happy tears. I was ready to go.
Everything was perfect, I was learning, teaching, and was in the center of the Gospel of Jesus Christ.
The day came when I entered into the field, it was wonderful. My first area was Middletown, California. I loved it, nothing could take away my joy and excitement. My companion was awesome, the area was beautiful, and life couldn't be changed.
After about 4 weeks in the mission field everything from the change had settled down. My new life had begun. I quickly realized something... something I hadn't felt in my whole life.....I missed home.....I missed my family, friends, and the activities I enjoyed at home. Everything felt so distant in my life. People who I cared about were so far away. I...just...missed them.
For the first time in my life I felt alone. Rejection became more noticeable, people didn't understand how I felt. It was dark, and even in the light I couldn't feel the warmth. Everything seemed to be lost, my desire, excitement, and joy faded away. I wanted to give in to the world, to go home. The contempt of the inadequacy had entered into my mind. The torture inside, or Satan working diligently to bring you down is treacherous. I was sure I could do this by myself, that I could conquer the pain.
Two or three weeks later, I was reading a talk given by Elder Holland(one of many leaders of our church). He Directed his talk to those who feel completely alone. Those who have felt forsaken, betrayed, befriended, or lost. This talk was directed straight to me or anyone who has felt these bitter pains.
Although I was troubled by my own fears or discouragement, I had missed the whole point of the Saviors ministry. I didn't understand his gospel, his work. I didn't realize, I could use Him who knew me and knew how I was feeling. He walked the road of every trial, pain, sickness and temptation for us. I could use him, I could understand he would be there to help me. He knows what I felt. In the Gospel of John, Jesus Said, "I will not leave you comfortless: I will come to you." He will walk beside you during your trails, take his yoke. Understanding he was the only one who could help me overcome my challenges was difficult or hard for me to grip. My problem was not letting him in or giving him a chance to work His miracle into my heart. After much prayer and reading the scriptures, I let him into my life. . One of my favorite quotes is "When you choose Christ, you choose to change." I needed to change, and I did.
separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord."
I am so thankful for the Sacrifice Christ made. For in Him we are made alive, through Him each of us can live the love of God, and by Him all things are possible. Don't separate yourself from god. He cares for you!! All he wants from us is putting our trust in him. "Seek ye first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added unto you." (3 Nephi 13:33) He promises us great blessings, he is bound when we do what he says, but when we do not what he says, we have no promise. Great things await us.
Take his yoke, and not only overcome your situations, but defeat them with glory. We are in a fight everyday against those who do not want us to be happy. Those who want us to be against God. Pray always to conquer him who upholds his work. Heavenly Father is there for each and everyone of us. We are His spirit children. I know these things to be true, in His name, Jesus Christ, amen.